Why are YOU still single?

Kalleen Rose Ozanic, Staff Writer

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Are you lonely?
According to many modern influences, the average teenager can be summed up in two ways: single or taken. For the lonesome of us, single is your thing. It’s your comfort zone–your rock. In some cases, it’s the comfort zone you desperately try to escape. Other people are partnered in an adolescent relationship. Now, while we all can’t be Buttercup and Wesley from “The Princess Bride” (let’s face it: none of us can) or Kat and Patrick from “10 Things I Hate About You”, at the very least, we sure can dream. In the meantime though, here’s the lowdown on your isolation.

The Hermit
There’s the Hermit. You tend to be locked up in your tiny shell, every so often seeing the light of day when you need a new one. You spend many days holed up reading or binge-watching movies and tv shows on Netflix. The fictional world is far more interesting than the one that goes on outside your door, so what’s the point of going out? I feel you. Try to exit your shell every once in awhile. I promise, the sun won’t bake your skin.

The Nerd
Yes, the Nerd. You are single for an entirely different reason: you are emotionally involved with your own intelligence. Study another hour, why don’t you? Maybe if you try hard enough, someone will text you. Not the case. Stop doing all your textbook work at lunch and engage in some social interactions! You might be surprised when someone returns the favor!

The Geek
As a geek, you probably prefer comic book, fanfic, or literary obsessions to human beings (that’s okay, sometimes they’re not that great, anyway). Your need to see the next episode, read the next book, or get the newest issue consume you. Rather than spending your time researching comic book characters, put some thought into your peers. Maybe you both have something in common that you can talk about, like the latest superhero movie!

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