Ten Grossest Candles Ever

• Bacon:

I don’t understand why people have such an obsession with bacon-flavored things. I get it, bacon is amazing. Why not have everything bacon-flavored so everything would taste and smell good? It sounds like a good idea, right? Well it’s not. Most bacon-flavored products are just disgusting and are nothing like actual bacon. This candle is no exception. Just stick to actual bacon.

• Zoo:

I don’t understand why anyone would want the smell of animal feces in their house. If you’re trying to mimic the jungle or something, this is not the way to do it. This is just a bad idea. Just spend the money to go take a trip to Africa or something, because this candle won’t be what you expect.

• Skunk:

Okay. I can’t even defend anyone on this. Who in their right mind likes the smell of skunk? Seriously?

• Fart:

Alright, this one is kind of funny. This would make a good present as a joke for a friend. It would still smell awful, but would get a few laughs out of your friends. But this wouldn’t exactly be romantic for that special someone.

• Vomit:

I can understand buying the fart scented candle as a joke, but this is just disgusting. Nobody likes to vomit. Nobody likes the smell of it. Why would a vomit scented candle even be a good idea? If you want to pull a joke on a friend, give them some mercy and just buy the fart candle.

• Gasoline:

This isn’t too bad. Gasoline doesn’t smell THAT bad to begin with. If you’re a mechanic or obsessed with vehicles, I can understand this one. I mean, it still won’t smell nice, but it could be worse. So this would be a decent gift for some mechanic.

• Body Odor:

We all hate the smell of sweaty students in the locker room, weight room, and gym. So they make a body odor scented candle? Is it manly or something? Well, if it is I can tell you that it’s just gross. Being “manly” doesn’t always attract a girl. Stick to deodorant please.

• Rest Stop:

Just no. Public bathrooms are awful. This is just awful.

• Spawn of the Devil

I don’t really know how to describe this smell. All I know is that it combines the worst possible scents in existence to create one scent that could probably kill you. Apparently it’s just beyond horrible.

• Money:

Money doesn’t really smell bad. But I don’t see the point of this candle. Maybe some rich guy who is really greedy and obsessed with money would like this candle. I am really not sure. This isn’t terrible, but kinda pointless. Unless you’re a rich jerk.

Well, these scents actually exist. I don’t know why anyone created these though. But they’re apparently successful. So if you want something absolutely horrible, just buy one of these.