Students “pee”ved over bathroom issue


Kalleen Rose Ozanic, Staff Writer

Though the last (or so we hope) bomb threat at West Milford High School took place on November 3, 2015, we are still feeling the effects of it. Career Day was ruined. There is a shadow cast over this school. An evil darkness has befallen this institution. It is waiting to be purged. Now, consequences must be dealt. One must use the loo prior to school, or face customs at each lavatory. Don’t forget your passport! Buh-Bye! The halls are filled with groans of urinary agony, and desperate bids for relief of “Ohmigod my bladder is going to burst!”
Bomb threats had become the norm for a period of time at this school. Mr Pollaro states in reference to the bomb threats, “If it is going to continue at this rate, we’re going to escalate our response.”
And what is a student to do about such a conundrum? What can anyone do?!?! We must band together! We must be strong! Hold in your pee! But what’s this? On the morning of November 17, 2015, Mr. Pollaro stated over the morning announcements that the upstairs bathrooms would be open all day! Huzzah! Take that, you terroristic delinquents! HA! HA! The bathroom gods have listened to our prayers. In the meantime, Mr. Pollaro says “this [bathroom policy] is going to continue.”
Perhaps things are on the p and up. But anyone can say how truly bothersome it is to sign in and sign out of the bathrooms. Regardless of expressed annoyance, the new bathroom policy seems to be effective. “It’s quiet. A person in my position can never say it’s all clear,” however, Pollaro attests.
It would also be much more bothersome that extra school days could be necessary to make up for lost instructional time. It is possible the masses will be punished for the actions of the few. Not only will students have time taken away from their days, but teachers must be present and away from their families as well.
Perhaps the culprit wanted to avoid a test third period, or maybe he truly has issues. But under any circumstances, it is unacceptable to endanger the welfare of others. Besides the fact that our rights to use the privy freely have been ripped away from us! Mind you, that the only responsible party for this is the terroristic delinquent, not the teachers or administrators. This policy has only been instituted in order to maintain a state of normalcy. So when the basic right to pee in peace is stolen from us, what do we do? We reclaim what is rightfully ours! And to quote a favorite movie of mine, “Bridge to Terabithia,” “FREE THE PEE!” Indeed we will.
The next time there is any distressing occurrence anywhere, take a stand! Stick up for what you believe in! Don’t be bystanders in your own life; solve a problem! So when I ask, “What are we going to do the next time there is a bomb threat?” Your answer shouldn’t be, “Stage an organized walk-out!” It should be “There won’t be another bomb threat!” And why is that? Because we value our peeing rights! We value our freedom!
End rant.